Brrr. It's F'in cold in here.

I'm currently sitting in my living room on my amazingly cozy new couch (thank you Ikea for coming to Dalian).  One bad thing, I'm freezing cold.  My  best friends in the winter are my "thermo-electric water bags" (that's what the box called it anyway).  It's basically a hot water bottle that you plug into the wall and it boils the water inside.  It's covered in fabric so you don't burn yourself like with a typical hot water bottle.  Anyway, they are amazing.  I sit on the couch with a blanket on me and one bag in my lap and one on my feet.  After that, I'm usually somewhat comfortable.  And that is while wearing flannel pants and a fleece jacket.  Oh!  And I have a radiator right behind me.

Now after all that, you might ask why I'm still so cold.  Well, the government controls the heat.  This usually isn't so bad since the school installed some extra doors in the kitchen and the balcony, but this year something is different.  When the radiators first turned on it was so hot in our apartment, probably about 80 degrees.  I don't know what happened but every week, it gets colder and colder in here.  I don't know if someone complained that it was too warm or what, but I swear it's colder than two weeks ago in the apartment.  Oh and the heat is only turned on a few hours a day.  I think it turns on at about 6 am for a few hours and again at about 5 pm for a few hours.  On really cold days, it's on longer.  Today it's been on for about 5 hours so far this evening, but it is by no means warm.

This is the same at work.  In the past, the school where I work didn't pay the outrageous fee to have the radiators turned on at the school during the winter.  I thought that made quite a bit of sense since most of our classes are during the weekend and during the day (mostly when the radiators aren't turned on anyway).  It worked out fairly well as every classroom and office had an electric heater in it that was used when needed.  This year, however, the school has opted to pay for the radiators.  So when I arrive at 7:30 am, my office is nice and toasty, but towards noon it gets quite chilly.  The classrooms are a different story.  Those might be warm if the doors and windows were kept closed (the students feel the need to wear 5 layers and a coat then complain about being too warm so they open the windows during break time when the teachers aren't in the room).  The school might be warm if the front doors were kept closed too.  One terrible habit that the Chinese have is that they keep doors open constantly.  Even I have come to the point that if I see that the front door to a store isn't open then I won't even try to go in.  Now, this could all be solved if we could use the heaters that we have used in the past.  However, they have all been unplugged and the socket is located in the ceiling.  This is inaccessible without a ladder (which is kept locked up).  Even if one were able to climb up and plug in the heater, you need a remote to operate it.  Those are kept locked up at the front desk.  One has to ask a receptionist for it.  The worst part is that I have a class in a classroom that is located in the center of the school between two hallways; radiators only run along exterior walls.  No heat whatsoever in that classroom.

Notice all the coats and layer upon layer of clothes underneath.  And I guarantee they are all wearing at least 2 layers of long underwear.

I do have it better than a lot of people.  I have heard that it is illegal to occupy a home that hasn't paid the radiator fee, but some still do it.  Their apartments have to be freezing cold.  Even some offices and other places of work don't use heat.  Howie had a job in the past like that.  He wore his coat and hat all day while sitting at a computer working.

It's the same in the summer.  While it doesn't get too hot here in the summer most days, the humidity is at least 90% and we do hit 100 degrees for a about a week or so.  There is a law that if the temperature is more than 40 degrees Celsius then people don't have to go to work.  Magically, it never gets above 39 degrees.

Last summer our school had to relocate because the original building was being resurfaced.  We moved to a large building across the street where we occupied about half the space as our original school.  At first, no air conditioners were installed except the large stand alone unit that went into the lobby.  Eventually, management realized that our classrooms were going to get really hot with up to 20 kids in each tiny classroom and installed one wall unit in each classroom.  This was great until the really hot days came (sweating at 9:00 am is not my favorite thing).  The classrooms were so close together and only separated by one thin sheet of dry wall.  There was one window in each classroom.  Because the classrooms were so close together, we had to keep the doors closed so as not to interrupt each others classes.  This caused another problem, no circulation.  No breeze will come through an open window if it has nowhere to go.  Because of this, we turned on the air conditioning units.  Great idea until we realized one very hot morning that every light and A/C unit was connected to the same circuit breaker.  Every classroom went dark and got really hot every time we tried to turn on the A/C.  Teachers were constantly taking turns to get shocked by the breaker box in order to have light again.  I eventually gave up on using the A/C and just opened my door.  Others did this as well and we were pretty much yelling over each other in order to "teach".

Now, this is not horrible when compared to the working conditions of others in this country.  I don't know many people who are blue collar workers so I don't know much about this.  However, my father-in-law recently retired from butchering pigs but became a bit stir crazy just staying at home every day.  Because of this he decided to take seasonal jobs in different cities.  At his last position, he was a sort of on-site accountant for a construction company.  His job was to wake up at about 4:00 am every morning and wait for material delivery.  He then had to go through every crate or box to make sure that everything was in order.  While he was not doing much manual labor like his coworkers were, he was still housed with them.  As I mentioned in a previous post, most laborers who work on sites like these are unskilled workers from rural areas.  Therefore, the workers live together on site.  No matter the season, the first thing the workers do when they arrive is to build their living quarters.  These are small one story buildings made of what looks to me like corrugated steel.  The walls are white and the roofs are blue.  Inside there are bunk beds and maybe a couple of small tables or chairs to play cards and have meals.  It is a shelter, and that is all.  Most of the ones that I've seen (only from the outside, I've never been in one) have a couple of bare light bulbs hanging from the ceiling.  I have never seen a place where a bathroom might be since there are windows all around the building (unless there is a window in the bathroom, but I always just see bunk beds in front of every window).  I'm assuming they use a sort of outhouse but most wouldn't consider this so bad since most of the laborers use outhouses at their own houses.

Anyway, some of these men work 12 hours a day with little or no safety equipment.  The city is building a subway here and there is a construction site right next to our school.  The subway has collapsed numerous times so far.  It's scheduled to open in two years, but I don't see that happening.  When it does open, I think I'll wait a while to use it since it just keeps collapsing.  I'm not sure if anyone has been trapped in the tunnels, but that wouldn't be reported since most of the fall-ins aren't reported anyway.

The fruit stands near my home are funny to see in the winter.  In the past, the vendors would just suffer the cold while wearing what looked like coats made out of comforters.  This year they all banded together and built little huts made of spare wood and plastic sheets.  They also jimmied together a small wood stove of sorts.  On one end of their hut, they have a place to burn whatever it is they are using which feeds into a metal pipe. The pipe is run across the top of the hut to a hole in the opposite wall.  It can get nearly comfortable in the fruit huts now.

The mechanics shop that we bring our car to charges extra in the winter to wash a car.  This is because they have to heat the water so it doesn't freeze while hand washing the car.  (It costs about $5 to get your car washed by hand here.)  I feel sorry for the guy that works there.  The garage doors are always wide open and he's constantly getting splashed by water.

Howie's best friend, Allan, works in the law department of some huge corporation.  He arrives at work at about 7:00 am and usually doesn't leave until 10:00.  He works 7 days a week usually.  Occasionally, he'll have a Sunday off.  He spent numerous nights sleeping in his office because there just wasn't enough time to go home, sleep, and come back.  He makes roughly $600 a month.

One job that I would never want is to be a street sweeper.  One reason that littering is so common here is because there are people who walk around on every street and sweep up everything (also there aren't many trashcans on the streets).  The past few weeks, one of the jobs that these people have had is to wash the dividers in the middle of the streets.  Only once have I seen a road block to make drivers pull into a different lane so as to avoid hitting those who are washing the barricades in the middle of the road.

There are many times that I've had to walk under a man welding a sign to the front of a store.  No welding visor or gloves on a rickety ladder in the middle of a busy sidewalk.  I watched a man using a skill saw (the rotary power saw) the other day.  He placed the wood to be cut on two saw horses.  Lifted one of his legs to hold the wood in place then cut the wood towards himself!  I kept waiting for him to hit a knot in the wood or something and cut into his leg.  He must have had a lot of practice doing this because he was fine when he was done.

According to people I've talked to, China has seen huge improvements on worker safety and the like.  And for the most part, it's not the government who is ignoring this problem, but the employers.  There are ways of getting around the laws (like guanxi) and there are other employers who just don't care.

Here is a photo I took at a construction site for a house that Howie and I were thinking of buying.  We just walked right in, no security, no one asked us to leave, and many of the employees were not wearing hard hats.

Kardashians to Child Labor

I am completely addicted of gossip magazines and read through the Us Weekly app on my iPod every morning and evening.  Admittedly, the comments made by the catty women following each article are what really tickle my fancy.  They routinely rip apart every celebrity and each other.

Naturally, one of the celebrities, or group of celebrities, that they tear into are the Kardashians.  I had no idea who these women were as I came to China before they became (in)famous.  As far as I know, they are trust fund "ladies", who have a show (had a show?), and have an affinity for marrying NBA players.

One of the recent articles about this family included allegations that they knowingly employed children working in sweat shops in China to produce whatever product it is that they make.  Following suit, the regular group of women started ripping apart the K's.  One woman defended the family by saying they probably didn't even know that was going on and that woman was then attacked.  But this is not about the vicious women who read gossip rags, nor is it about the Kardashians, it's about child labor and working conditions in China.

While we can all probably agree that child labor is bad, we would probably agree that starving families is worse.  For the most part, that is why children are forced to work in the first place.  "But why aren't the children going to school?  Doesn't the government try to step in?"  Well, no.  In China, going to school is an option; an expensive option at that.  Many children of blue collar workers will usually only finish primary school.  In a country where there are so many people, competition is cut throat, even for children a mere 7 years old.  In order to go to middle school, students must pass an "entrance examination".  Their entire primary school education leads up to this one test that will determine if they can go to middle school and which middle school they can attend.  If your grade is high enough, you can usually have your pick of school (assuming your family can afford it).  If you either can't afford the better school or your grade wasn't high enough, you can go to one of the other schools.  But even the "not so good" schools cost money.  And that's money that some families just don't have.

Children here are put into different "private academies" from the time they are able to speak.  The youngest student I've had in one of my classes was 3 years old.  The price of these extra classes can range anywhere from 500 RMB per semester to thousands of RMB per semester.  (The school I work for is neither the cheapest nor the most expensive and runs about 1,500 RMB per semester.)

Let's look at how a child of a blue collar family would fare among his classmate whose parents work in offices.  Let's assume that child A's family earns about 4,000 RMB per month.  If they don't own their own apartment, we can automatically deduct 1,000 to 2,000 for rent.  Let's take the average and say 1500.  They are down to 2,500 per month of income.  Subtract utilities, cell phone charges (everyone and their dog has a cell phone here), random repairs to the house, insurances and fees.  That's about 2,000 per month.  Feeding a family of three (remember the one child policy and assuming the retired grandparents don't live with them) brings it it about 1,000 per month.  Then we've got school supplies, bus fare, random things that people need to stay healthy (maybe medicine once in a while, toiletries, etc).  We're down to about 750 RMB per month.  If one English class costs 1000 per semester (we'll assume this child is going to an English school with only Chinese teachers teaching, no foreign teachers) that's about 150 RMB per month.  That family has 600 RMB per month now.  Then we have to add in that the kid needs to take supplementary classes in art, science, math, geography, history, and Chinese in order to keep up with his classmates.  That family has nothing left and we haven't even counted in the tuition for the primary school, the books for the classes, and the uniforms.

When we compare this to child B's family, we can see that there is not really any competition here.  Even middle class families have a huge advantage in this area.  We'll assume that the parents make about 8,000 RMB.  2,000 for an apartment (although most of them own because it is customary for the groom's family to buy a house for the new couple for their wedding).  These children will probably eat better food, attend better schools, have nicer clothes, and probably have private tutors.  Even if these two families might end up with the same amount of savings after each month, child B's education is much greater than that of child A's. In many situations, middle class families have what is referred to as guanxi (or relationships), this will also influence the price of things.  A past private student of mine lived in what I would consider to be a high-middle-class family.  His mother was a professor at a university and his father either owned his own company or was high up in this company.  Because the wife worked for a university which has a primary, middle, and high school affiliated to it, her son is guaranteed acceptance to the schools throughout his school career.  They also don't have to pay for it.  (I might mention this is one of the best schools in the city.)  The wife makes about 5,000 or 6,000 RMB per month and her entire salary goes towards classes for her son.  They live solely on the husband's income.

Now imagine something happens where one of child A's parents is unable to work any more.  (We've all heard about the safety regulations here, or lack of them.)  That family's income is significantly reduced.  Unless that child is the first ranking child in the school, he will probably have to drop out of school.  Not only because of the lack of funds for tuition, but the lack of funds to pay for the medical bills, food, and rent.  Now, we have a family who has only one income.  Depending on the guanxi that this family has as well as any familial relation that is willing or able to help, this child may end up having to go to work to help support his family.  This might mean begging on the street, becoming a pickpocket, or working in a factory.  This child doesn't have any marketable skills, usually.  Occasionally, children will be sent to different cities to find work in a "bathhouse".  These bathhouses are just that, a large bathroom where you can take a hot shower and get massages and exfoliating rubs.  It is common for Chinese people to visit these establishments.  Some are respectable while others are just an excuse for a whore house.  Many of the young ladies who are forced to drop out of school to earn money for their family resort to prostitution in the bathhouses.

Therefore, we, finally, get to child labor.  Of course, depending on the company that one works for, there can be deplorable working conditions.  However, to say that children should not be working is not an acceptable answer to child labor.  Many if not most children who hold jobs in China did not wake up one morning and think, "To hell with school.  I can make a ton of money by starting to work now.  Who cares if I am only 12?"  Instead, it is usually a long thought out and decision after numerous hours of discussion with loved ones.  "Yes, sorry little Jimmy, you can't go to school anymore.  We can't afford it and we need help to buy food.  You need to find a job."

Again, here many people would jump in and say, "But don't they have insurance?  Aren't doctors required to  treat sick people even if they don't have insurance?  Doesn't the government have welfare systems for these occasions?  What about the Red Cross?"  Let's answer these one by one...

Insurance:  While many people do have insurance through their employer, many others do not.  If there is a law requiring all companies to provide health insurance to full time workers, I am not aware of it (nor do I claim to be all knowing in any area, especially Chinese law).  If there is a law, many companies can get by with not providing insurance due to the aforementioned guanxi.

Doctors:  Hospitals are not required to help in any case.  If a patient comes in to the ER bleeding out, the hospital isn't required to do anything to help unless that person pays the estimated bill before any procedure is done.  And no, showing an insurance card doesn't work.  You pay then insurance reimburses you later.  Don't have the $5,000 required to reattach your severed leg right now?  Oh.  Tough luck.  Looks like you have just enough to afford the doctors to stop the bleeding and stitch it up.

Welfare:  Not a clue.  I've never heard of anyone receiving financial aid from the government in cases of poverty.  Again, not sure, but never heard even the tiniest suggestion of it.

Red Cross:  I believe it was about a year ago, the president of the Chinese Red Cross was thrown in jail and possibly executed because he was stealing donations.  Many people had donated to a child who couldn't afford a necessary surgery.  The child died before the money got to the family because the president of the organization used the money instead of passing it on.

I hope I have clearly laid out why one should not jump the gun on banning all child labor.  Of course, there are horrible jobs out there.  There is child trafficking.  There is slavery.  There are terrible things being done in some places.  But for some of these families, that is, sadly, the only way they can continue to survive.

I hope to explore this further in the weeks to come.

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I have not written this to say that child labor is good or that everyone should condone it.  It's just to help open some eyes as to why some parents send their children to work instead of to school.

Students

Our student received the highest award at the speech competition a few weeks ago.  She was thrilled, except for the fact that her classmate also got the highest award.  Her classmate is the headmistress's daughter and apparently quite a bitch.

We have a new student starting soon.  She just finished taking her SATs, TOEFL, and the like.  She wants us to teach her AP Physics and stuff like that.  I figure if she already knows physics, why doesn't she just use a dictionary to translate those words?  While meeting with her about a month ago, she would constantly roll her eyes at me and speak rudely.  But $35/hour is good money and she can roll her eyes at me all she wants for that price.

I am constantly amazed by the amount of kids here that are being forced to learn English beyond what is taught at their schools.  Even more amazing is the price that these parents are willing to pay!  When I first arrived here, I was told that 100 RMB/hour (about $15) is an average price for a one-to-one class with a native speaker.  About a year or two later, the price went up to 150 RMB.  At one point, we had so many students and I had no evening off that I started telling people that classes were 200 RMB/hour.  I did this assuming most would say that was too expensive and I would be able to have some time off.  As of now, I have one evening with no students.  It's nice and it sucks at the same time.

On that note, gotta get ready for another class.  9 year old.  Our first class with him is tonight.

Speech Competition

Howie and I's Monday night student is a 12 year old girl.  She has been to the US and has very good English for her age.  Her teacher chose her to participate in a city wide English speech competition this Sunday.

On Monday night, I proofread her speech and helped her with pronunciation and pacing.  Howie helped her with hand motions and facial expressions (very important during speeches here).  I'd say all this took about 40 minutes.

Wednesday night, her mother calls us to say that the English teacher thought the speech was too pessimistic (the title was "The Older I Grow, the Lonelier I Am" after all).  Her mother asks Howie if we can write a new speech for her...  And can we have it finished in 30 minutes!  "Okay", Howie says, "No problem."  We start writing.

I'm happy to say that we completed a 2 minute long speech in about 20 minutes entitled "The Older I Grow, the More Excited I Become".  Our student's father showed up a little before we finished.  He copied it to his flash drive and took it home for her.

She will come to our house again tonight (even though she has a fever and will be working on the speech all day today at home since her teacher excused her from school for this) and again on Saturday night.

Creeping Back

I randomly started thinking about posting again.  I am horrible at doing this mostly because I would rather be playing video games or watching Netflix.

I logged on after more than a year today to find that so much has changed to the layout of Blogger.  I really like that I can see how many people have viewed my posts and where the traffic is coming from.  I was checking all that out when I noticed that my post about my hospital stay had received nearly 450 views.  I thought, "What the heck is going on?"  I looked to see where all these views were coming from.  A vast majority of them were from an adult forum.

Some guy (who I was able to track down thanks to the Internet; he lives in MA), found my post about the surgery rather appealing.  Therefore, he posted a link to my post on his forum thread on this adult website with a short explanation about my post.  He also included about 10 other blogs.

I was a little surprised to find this information, but even more surprised that someone would find that post at all, ahem, appealing.

It seems to be genetic

My husband has always had a problem with not turning off lights.  When he comes home from work, I follow him around the apartment for about 15 minutes just so I can turn off all the lights that he somehow forgets to turn off despite my constant reminders.

All his friends who come to visit are very good about turning off the lights when they exit a room, which makes me think this is not a Chinese thing.

About two weeks ago Howie's cousin-in-law, aunt, and second cousin came to visit and stayed in our spare room.  The same thing.  Every light in the house was constantly on.  Okay, so maybe it's only some of the family...

Howie's sister and brother-in-law are currently staying with us.  Same problem.  Lights.  On.  Constantly.  I mean, give me a break!

Our electricity bill is outrageous every month.  So much so that we unplug nearly everything when we finish using it (obviously not the refrigerator).  Blankets and coats are used in the winter instead of the heater and the water heater is only turned on about 20 minutes before we take showers.  Howie can remember all these things, but not turning off a light.

I'm beginning to think I am doomed to a life of wasted electricity.

Meghan's Account of the Dalian Dinner

I stole the following from my friend Meghan's blog.

In which I became a cautionary tale of future maid of honors at Chinese wedding dinners

Su-Mai-En! Su-Mai-En!! As the banquet hal full of chinese people chanted my (Chinese) name, I started to sincerely reconsider the wisedom of my choice to be Maid of Honor at a Chinese wedding dinner.

My ordeal started two weeks before, when a friend of mine asked me to be maid of honor at her Chinese wedding dinner.  Knowing as I did that her wedding involved a donkey parade, jumping over a lit oven and ridiculous Qing-era clothing, I decided that, as maid of honor, I would try to do an american style toast, so some part of her wedding would have a familiar element to her.

Chinese wedding dinners are an example of what happens when cultural traditions and etiquette, originally made to make life more pleasant, becomes an odious process that serves to confuse and exasperate everyone involved.

The Chinese wedding dinners involve "red envelopes" in which the people who are invited must come and are obligated to give a certain amount of money to the bride and groom- if they fail to do this, they lose face.  It's a tacky, antiquated tradition that often puts chinese people into a catch-22 postion,  since they have to come to the wedding dinner and they must give a certain amount of money, which is at least 200 rmb, which is, for most chinese people, a substantial percentage of their monthly paycheck. So they can't not go- they would lose face, but at the same time they can't go, because they can't afford the money.

Anyway- because of this catch 22 situation, the chinese teachers in my school were placed in a cultural conundrum, that resulted in two weeks of wavering between all the CTs not going, all the CTs going, and only some of the CTs going.  I decided to organize an american-style gift- in which all of the CTs going would pay a certain amount of money for one large gift.  This seemingly easy idea caused me much stress as we had to get through all of their "face issues" - and resulted in me dragging an enormous, cast iron "hanging arch" lamp through the labyrinth that is the Dalian IKEA, after my friend decided that since he had carried another, much lighter lamp before, since I changed my mind, I would have to carry this lamp myself. The frantic IKEA trip culminated with the two of us getting into a ridiculous, yet heated argument over the importance of wrapping paper and ribbon for a wedding present.

So, cut to the next day: I discovered that, as a Chinese maid of honor, besides giving a speech, I had to follow around the bride, holding a tray full of cigarettes and candies to give to all the men at the dinner.  I thus became the most sullen maid of honor as the sexist symbolism of the entire tradition was far too wretched for me to stomach gracefully.  Luckily, as the bride was an American, wearing four inch heels, a blue ballgown and a fur shawl, she was with me in the opinion that this was awful. 

Finally, I was able to sit down with all of my coworkers, leaving the bride and groom at the mercy of Chinese wedding dinner games and the malevolent guests who enforce them.  Or at least, that is how I'll try to remember the evening.  In reality, The groom announced that he had written a love song for his beautiful bride, and that, " The guests would like the maid of honor, Su-Mai-En, to dance to the song." 

Have you ever thought that you are in the midst of a nightmare? I have before. The difference between this time and the other times is that this time? I didn't wake up.  As the third round of "Su-Mai-En!! Su-Mai-En!" started up, I realized that, short of bolting for freedom , I was going to have to dance. 

As the groom started singing, acapella, a song that went along the lines of, " Alicia, I love you, love you, love you. Alicia, I love you!" I awkwardly hopped, tap danced and twirled around, doing at best, an interpretive dance, and at worst, my impersontion of a chicken, while 100 chinese strangers cheered (or jeered) and laughed.  I was a scene from bad '90s era teen movie.

My only consolation was that at least, besides my coworkers and my friend, no one I knew would ever see this.  Even this small consolation was taken from me when I was finally allowed to leave the stage, and I discovered that my Judas of a friend had filmed the entire, mortifying ordeal- from my attempt to escape, slithering my way under the table at the beginning, to the end, when I attacked the groom, wrenching the microphone out of his hand. 

wicked Chinese wedding dinner guests: 3,000,000,000
Meghan (aka Su-Mai-En): - dignity

Kim Jong-il came to Dalian

Seriously, he did.  It was all very hush hush that Kim Jeong Il came to China at all.  I had just heard that he went to Beijing to meet with Hu JinTao for some sort of diplomatic thing.

I was tutoring one of my kids one day and he started telling me how his father saw Mr./President/Dictator Kim at the Furama Hotel down by ZhongShan Square.  So here's the story...

My student's dad, Mr. Zhang, was sitting in a tea house in the Furama Hotel (fancy fancy fancy expensive hotel) enjoying ridiculously over priced tea when a very ugly man walked into the hotel surrounded by body guards.  Mr. Zhang didn't really believe what he was seeing.  As he continued to watch this man, he realized this was indeed Kim Jong-il, the horribly oppressive dictator of North Korea.

When I asked my husband if he knew that Kim had come to Dalian, he just looked at me like I was dumb.  Apparently, every Dalianese knew he had been to Dalian.  My husband later told me that the Chinese government had paid for everything while Kim was visiting China.

Culture Shock

I found a question online recently about culture shock in China.  I thought it was interesting.  Though I don't have too much anymore, if at all.  Here are a few things that I find odd, disgusting, or maybe shocking.

Bathrooms- You must carry around your own toilet paper.  Roll up your pant legs because you don't want to drop your pants in all the liquids on the bathroom floor.  Women don't like to close the doors on the stalls when they are occupying them.  No soap or hot water in public bathroom sinks.

Street Fighting- If someone is attacked, no one will help.  I saw a man getting beat in the middle of the road by three other men who were using fists, feet, and beer bottles.  The cars on the road just sat there and honked for them to get out of the way.  Pedestrians just stood there and watched.  A different fight I saw (I later learned that a man was killed during it) was at a popular park with carnival rides.  Even the security guards stood and watched and started to run off when the fight moved over towards them.

Bodily Fluids on the Streets- As it is getting warmer out, people are more and more willing to relieve themselves on the street.  I couldn't even tell you how many men I have seen urinating out in the open.  Most of them don't even try to conceal themselves.  Men and women, old and young, spit constantly... anywhere.  On the street, in stores, in restaurants, and hospitals.  One day I stopped at the small market near my home to see two little girls carefully placing cardboard on the sidewalk right by the store door.  They then pull down their pants and hover over the cardboard and begin to defecate.  This is followed by, "Mom! Mom! I'm done! Mom!".

Babies-  Split pants.  They are pants for babies with splits in the crotch.  These babies usually don't wear diapers so they get a nice breeze wherever they go.  When the parent decides that the baby should go to the bathroom they simply hold them over a trash can or bush and make a hissing sound so the baby knows it's okay to pee now.  I once saw this in the VIP bathroom at the train station.  The mother was waiting in line for a stall until the cleaner came up to her and told her she could just hold the baby over the sink.  On the bus one day I saw a woman sitting down holding her baby on her lap.  Nothing out of the ordinary there until you notice what the baby is wearing.  A bib.  That is all.  I kid you not, and that is fairly normal in the hot summer.

Restaurants-  There is a saying in Chinese that the servers' thumbs are always cold.  This is because their thumbs are quite often stuck in your rice as they carry the rice to your table.  I have seen dogs and cats and naked babies and urinating dogs in restaurants here.  Don't have an ashtray at your table?  No problem, put it out on the table or the floor.

Tableware- Dishes are washed in cold water (even in private residences).  The dishes are then put away wet or given to you at a restaurant dripping with water.  Make sure your cup is clean by swishing beer around in it then poor it in your bowl or on the floor.

Street Markets and Open Markets- Need a whole chicken for your dinner party tonight?  You can buy one at the market.  Choose the live chicken that you want and they will kill it right there for you.  (I have also seen and heard dog markets.)  Go to the meat counter and point out what slab you want.  Make sure you wash it before you eat it.  It's been sitting there all day in the heat under a lamp with the butcher handling it over and over with the same gloves that he/she wears to take your money.

Those are just the things that I can think of at the moment.  Very few of these ever really get to me anymore.  Oh and you can get out of almost anything with money or your connections to people in the government.

Things I can always use from the States

People often ask me if I need anything mailed to me.  Truth is, no.  I don't need anything.  1.something billion people live here and survive (supposedly).  But honestly, there are many things I would like.

Here are some things that I never seem to have enough of in this country that I can't find here:

Baking Powder (I love pancakes)
Mapeline (again pancakes)
Soft bristle toothbrushes (though Elias just brought me a bunch)
Crest baking soda and peroxide toothpaste
Deodorant (I wish I had Chinese genes so I wouldn't sweat and stink so much, believe it or not, most people here don't use deodorant)
Cosmo (I need a break from it all once in a while)
Skim milk (I know that can't be shipped here but I haven't had real milk in nearly two years)
Butterfingers
Cake mixes
Swiffer (Okay, that's asking a lot, especially since I can't buy the refill pads here)
Sanitizing Wipes/Spray
T-Shirts that actually fit properly

Okay, okay.  A lot of those things aren't things I necessarily want here as much as things that I miss.  Sometimes I just wish I were back at home.

The Wedding Festivities

I was so excited to see my parents that I barely slept the night before the flight to Beijing. I didn't sleep on the flight at all. Howie and I were picked up at the airport by his friend's dad, Mr. Jia. We were then driven to the hotel. As we were hauling our bags out of the car my parents came out of the hotel. They had been up for hours and were sitting the in lobby reading. During hugs I introduced Howie and there were more hugs. Before meeting my parents Howie had asked me if he should hug my parents or shake their hands. I said hug my mom but my dad I'm not so sure. Turned out it didn't matter. As my dad said later, "A hug just felt like the right thing."

After settling in we headed out. I honestly can't remember what we did everyday after that but we did a lot in the little time we had in Beijing. If I remember right we were only there for 2 full days. During those days we did a lot of tourist stuff. We went to the Great Wall (JuYongGuan pass) where Howie and I put a padlock on a chain on the wall and threw the key over the wall, a little known tradition here to show never ending love.
We also went to Tian'anmen Square, Forbidden City, Ming Tombs, Olympic Village, and the Dali Lama Temple. We also had Peking Duck, it's quite tasty.

Here are the photos from Beijing. And one more album.

After going through Beijing we took the train (and introduced my parents to the Chinese queuing system) to Shenyang then a bus to Fushun where Howie's dad met us. The next couple days were spent touring Hada and meeting different family members. Howie also introduced me to his grandparents. We went to their grave where we lit cigarettes for them, poured Baijiu on the grave, and placing fruit near the gravestone. Some of Howie's friends from Dalian and Anshan came to town for the wedding as well.

You can see pictures from Hada here.

Now the day of the wedding... I woke up at 4:00 am to take a shower and wait for the hair/makeup girl to show up at about 5:00 am. It took nearly 2 hours for my hair and makeup to get done. A short while later the hotel room that I was staying at with my parents was filled with family and friends. I put on traditional Chinese clothes and sat on the bed to wait for Howie. He came shortly after I was all ready. He arrived on a horse followed by the sedan chair that I was going to ride in to Howie's house. When he got to the room ChungAi (Howie's best friend's girlfriend/my Maid of Honor) let Howie in after he knocked for what seemed forever. He kept knocking on the door and no one was moving. I tried to get up to open the door before I was told to sit down. Howie entered the room and we sat on the bed and started taking pictures. Most of the wedding day was posed for the cameramen. We took pictures on the bed, with my parents, Howie serving coffee to my parents, Howie and I drinking coffee together, Howie putting my shoes on for me, Howie and I bowing to each other and so on.

After all these pictures were taken and the cameramen were satisfied I was veiled and led down 3 flights of stairs to my sedan chair. Once there more pictures were taken. Then we were off. I was carried behind Howie, who was riding a horse. I knew we were close to the house when I heard hundreds of firecrackers and big boom fireworks going off. When we arrived I was helped out of the chair and led to a small platform. I stood on this, still veiled, and was fed a piece of candy by Howie's mother. I then fed a piece of candy to her. Then she gave me a large red envelope of money. I was now allowed to enter their house as their new daughter. But on the way I had to step over a stove of hot coals. Once in the house I sat on their bed where his mother gave me a cup of Pepsi and asked me if it was sweet. I had to respond with, "Yes, it's sweet." I still don't know why. Then I was unveiled. We took a bunch of family pictures before I was told to change to my white wedding gown.

Once in the white gown with red heels, Howie and I fed each other noodles and poached eggs. We were then ushered out the front door to the car that was waiting to take us to the restaurant. On the way, there were more fireworks and lots of confetti cannons. We rode in the car to the restaurant after we drove around the tiny town a bit. Once at the restaurant I had to scoot out of the car and take more pictures with the car. (Pretty cheesy if you ask me.) We then had more confetti cannons. When we stepped into the restaurant there were tons of people there and the floor was covered with sunflower seed shells. We were then ushered into the lobby of the hotel (it's one huge building built together). There we sat and talked to the announcer and waited for the appropriate time to go in to start the ceremony. (Howie told me that some of the old ladies would be looking at their watches to make sure we started at an auspicious time.)

When we were allowed to enter, Dad walked me for a short bit and gave me to Howie. Dad didn't hug me but he hugged Howie! lol. Howie's parents were introduced, my parents were introduced then Howie and I walked down the aisle to the stage while on both sides of us fireworks went off.

Once on stage we started the ceremony. There was a lot of talking that I didn't understand. At one point I was asked to say hello to everyone. Howie expected me to say it in Chinese but at this point I couldn't remember how to say even one word in Chinese. So I said, "Hello" in English but the microphone stayed in front of my face to I added, "Everybody." That is what I was told to say so I said it. I feel dumb now thinking of that! During the ceremony we lit the unity candle, had a prayer, Dad gave a blessing, and Howie's dad spoke. The mayor also spoke a bit which supposedly makes the wedding official. We cut a cake and poured wine into a wine glass tower. We were then told to drink from these glasses. (The night before we checked out the dining hall to make sure everything was okay where I noticed the glasses were disgusting and made sure that we weren't going to have to drink out of them. Howie said we wouldn't be drinking from them. I guess that plan was changed without us knowing until we had to drink from these disgusting glasses.) When the ceremony was done Howie and I walked out (or he practically carried me out because my feet hurt so bad from the shoes I was wearing).

I then changed into my third and final dress. Another red dress but not so traditional. We then returned to the dining hall where we greeted the guests that had remained there (originally there were 500 guests, by the time we came back only about 100 remained). I then began my bridely duty of lighting cigarettes for the men, pinning flowers in the old women's hair, and unwrapping candy and feeding it to other women and some men. Finally, I thought it was done when we got to the last table and had taken a few more photos with random people inside and out.

I was wrong again. We still had staged photos to take with just the parents. We went to our own private room to have lunch where I was given another red envelope of money, lit cigarettes for Howie's parents, Howie light cigarettes for mine, and I fed a fish eye to Howie's mother. After a few more shots of drinking and toasting, we were done. Actually done. The cameramen left, the horrible announcer left and we could eat. Of course we had some other family members come in to drink with us but it was much more laid back than earlier.

When it was all said and done I went to my parents' room to take a shower and get all the make up and hairspray off of me, not to mention all the horrible confetti that was stuck to me and in my hair.

I spent the afternoon watching TV with my mom while Dad took a nap and Howie spent time with his friends. That evening his friends, my parents, Howie and I, and Howie's dad went to dinner. After the dinner Howie's friends and he and I went to KTV. We finally went to Howie's parents' to sleep.

The day started at 4:00 am and didn't finish until about 2:00 am.

You can see all the pictures of the ceremony here.
Here.
Here.
And here.

After the wedding festivities, my parents came to Dalian where we showed them what we could while they were here. I'm afraid it wasn't a very relaxing visit for them.

Here are the photos from Dalian.

The Wedding is Coming

My wedding is about one week away. It will be a traditional Chinese wedding with a few Western traditions thrown it. At this point I don't really know what is going to happen. I know they basic outline but that's about it.

Many people keep asking me if I'm excited. Well, yes I am. But at the same time I mostly just want to get it over with. It has been months of questions and being completely in the dark at times. I can't speak with my future in-laws because of the language barrier. They are the ones planning the wedding. It's very frustrating. Right now I plan to just show up and do what I'm told until it's over. That probably sounds horrible but at this point I don't know what else I can do.

On another note... My parents will be here tomorrow night! I won't actually get to see them until Saturday morning but they will be in the same country as me in about 27 hours! I will meet them in Beijing and we'll spend a couple days there before heading to Howie's parents' house.

I have only two more days of work before I have more than a week off. I can't wait!

Oink Oink

It feels like SARS all over again. Yet again I am in China during a worldwide outbreak of a potentially deadly illness. During SARS the entire country was shut down for a long time. We were not permitted to leave the campus I was living at. If we did leave (I was classified as a teacher and could usually get out and back in), it was iffy if a store or bar or whatever would be open. I was not allowed on a train to go home from Beijing because my skin was hot (duh! I had a horrible sunburn).

This time, however, it's N1H1. Or as it's referred to by my students "The Pig Ill". As senior teacher at my job I am required to keep the other foreign teachers up to date as well as receiving hundreds of pointless emails from my manager or the head office of the corporation. Last week I received another email filled with tons of information that does not necessarily pertain to me. This one was about N1H1 preparedness.

According to this email the school I'm working for is cracking down on health. Rooms, toys, doorknobs, and chairs must be sprayed down with sanitizer after each class. Parents are not allowed in the school. And antibacterial soap must be placed next to the sink in the bathroom.

It was nice not to have a ton of parents in the hallways during our classes. (The parents talk loudly in the hall, answer their phones, and peek in the classroom to make sure the teacher is asking every question to their kid.) As this school is a business, this rule lasted about one hour. Instead of being refused to enter, the school found an old thermometer (which isn't accurate BTW) to scan everyone's hands before they enter.

As I expected, there is no sanitation going on.

The best part of this is the antibacterial soap. Laughable! It's a bottle of soap, or used to be. It is 95% water with a tiny bit of soap.

I asked why so many new rules were made. My manager said that two schools in this city had been closed due to N1H1. You'd think if schools had been closed (especially in a country that didn't even admit to having N1H1 until recently) that these precautions would be carried out.

I guess I know who will pay my hospital bills if I get N1H1.

Laziness and the Government

So, my last post was more than 8 months ago. Some of that is largely attributed to my laziness and/or work schedule. That last 4 or 5 months is due to a government ban on most blogs including this one.

Over the past 8 months a lot and only a little has happened.

I met Howie's family for the first time during Spring Festival (Chinese New Year). We traveled to his hometown, a very small village near Fushun, Liaoning, China. During the stay I was exhausted almost the entire time and very homesick. His family was so welcoming and felt like my own family so much that I wanted my family to be with me as well. Howie's parents are farmers. Not corporate farmers like the US is filled with but commune type farmers. His aunts, uncles, and cousins all help his parents farm their land and his parents help his aunts, uncles, and cousins farm theirs. His father is also a pig butcher.

Spending time with his family was great. They have a traditional countryside home. This means, no running water. All their water is from a well. The bathroom is a hole in the ground in an outhouse. They have the cleanest, best made outhouse I have ever seen. His uncle (who has a modern apartment in a town nearby) let me go there to take showers a couple times. There are only so many "baths" I can take by wiping my skin with a wet rag. Dinners were huge and long. One of the dinners we had lasted about 5 hours. I was about dieing by the end of it. All meals are eaten in his parents' bedroom which also doubles as a living room. A small table is placed on the bed (made of concrete) and we sit around and eat with everyone sitting on the bed.

The Spring Festival holiday was a week long this time. The entire week was spent having large dinners, going to other people's homes, learning how to make dumplings, and eating every part of the pig that can be eaten.

Here are pictures from Spring Festival. And here are pictures of his home and the village.

Howie officially proposed to me in April. I came home from work under the impression that Howie was sick. When I walked in the door the living room was filled with roses hanging from the ceiling and candles everywhere. We had planned on having Pizza Hut that evening so he had ordered pizza so we didn't have to go out. He sang a song for me that he had written and had even made a little shirt for our cat to wear that said "Alicia, marry me." I knew it was coming but I was still very surprised. He planned everything and had been planning for a long time.

Here are the pictures from that.

One thing that is done here that is very different from the West is wedding pictures. Though we still aren't married, we already have our wedding pictures. We had these taken in May. It took two days and was extremely tiring.

Here are the untouched photos.

Howie and I got our marriage license on June 18th. We had to go to Shenyang for that since I am a foreigner. I first had to go to the US Consulate there and receive a letter that said I am not married and I am old enough to be married by US law. That took forever. The next day we had to go to the registration office. When we got there we learned that Howie's Household book was missing a stamp. We could not get married without that. We had to hastily go to Howie's hometown about 2 hours away and get that stupid little stamp. I was so frustrated that I was crying. Nothing was going right. On our third day in Shenyang we finally got our license after shelling out about 900 RMB (it cost about 50 RMB for native Chinese to get married). After that we headed back to Howie's family's house and relaxed for a day or two before heading back home.

Here are pictures from Howie's house in the summer.

Since then most of our time has been spent working and planning for the wedding. (Which is in about 2 weeks!) Luckily, Howie's father is taking care of most of the planning as is tradition here.

Howie is busy at work getting ready for a sales fair in Guangzhou and I'm busy with my new position as Senior Teacher at the same school.

I will try to get on and do updates more often from now on now that I have a proxy that allows me to access the site.

The Apartment

I finally took some pictures of the apartment.
They are here.

Now that the daytime highs are a little less that freezing I have had to break out the space heater to keep warm. Not much time is spent in the living room because it's so cold. The kitchen is even worse! I try to keep the curtain between the living room and kitchen closed to keep out some of the cold air. When Howie cooks he actually wears his coat it's so cold.

The bathroom is always the warmest room in the house. Which is nice when you have to pull down your pants or take a shower.

We very rarely have ice form on the inside of the windows but it has happened in the kitchen. I'm just glad that I broke down and have accepted the Chinese custom of wearing long underpants (sometimes up to 3 pairs) 24/7 during the winter. I haven't quite gotten used to the long underwear shirts yet. They are quite different from the ones in the States... At least I can feel my legs when I go outside now.

The Most Humbling Experience

I have come through my surgery quite fine. As of now I still have some pain and it is tough to do some things but am getting better every day. The whole ordeal was extremely humbling and something I won't soon forget.

Wednesday afternoon, Jasmine and I went to the hospital to register. I paid the deposit and also paid a deposit for my hospital pajamas. We went to my room and situated some things. I also found out that they did in fact have a Western toilet in my room. I was so happy when I saw that. After talking to the doctor we left and I went home. On Thursday, I arrived at the hospital early in the morning with Howie to have some blood work done along with a chest X-Ray and EKG. I was put to the beginning of the line because I was a foreigner. During the short wait that I had many people were staring at me, which is normal, and asking Howie questions about me. After finishing at the hospital, Howie and I ran some errands and went home. Friday, we returned to the hospital to find out that my white blood cell count was elevated (Gee, surprise! It's been elevated since I arrived in Dalian.). Because of this I had to start IV antibiotics and hang out at the hospital for a while longer. They did let me go home that day though. Dr. Gong also talked to us about the procedure and had Howie sign a bunch of papers for me. We also explained to Dr. Gong how expensive the surgery was and how we couldn't really afford it. He promised to help us lower the costs. Saturday I didn't work because I had to go back to the hospital to have more IVs. That only lasted about half the day. After taking a nap at home, Patrick, Howie, and I went out to Pizza Hut, a sort of last hurrah for me. I ate as much cheese and grease as I could fit in me to last for the next few months. When we arrived home Howie and I packed for the hospital since I wouldn't be allowed to come home until I was discharged. This included cups, dishes, soap, and toilet paper since the hospital doesn't provide those things. After everything was packed we headed to bed. Sunday morning came way too fast. After a call to my parents, Howie and I headed to the hospital. I got my last antibiotic IVs, took a nap, and found out that I had to be shaved and have an enema. I was none too pleased when I found that out. Later in the afternoon I was led to the "dressing preparation room" where I was told to lay on a bed while Howie was sent out of the room and three nurses surrounded me. I was completely shaved from my upper thighs to the bottom of my rib cage. And not just shaved but dry shaved. Not too pleasant. Later that evening I received the unpleasant enema in the same room on the same bed. I returned to my bed after that and began the wait. From what the ladies in my room had told me I would be running for the bathroom in minutes. In preparation for this I untied the waist of my pants and sat on my bed. When it was finally time I had forgotten that I undid my pants and ended up partially loosing my drawers halfway to the bathroom. After all was said and done I settled into bed completely exhausted from the entire day. Monday was the day. I was woken up, as usual, at 5:30 for a temperature check (with a mercury thermometer and all). Since I wasn't allowed to have breakfast and my roommates snored I decided to go back to sleep. I slept until the nurses came in to tell me to change into clean hospital pajamas, remove my underwear, and put my shirt on backwards with the buttons on the back. After a short while, Patrick and Howie's little brother showed up. They were there to lift me from the surgery bed and carry me to my bed (about 5 feet) after the operation was over. Patrick was in charge of my shoulders and head, Howie in charge of my mid-section, and Howie's little brother in charge of my legs. Eventually, the nurses came back in and told me it was time. I got out of bed and got in a wheel chair and was then completely covered by a huge white comforter. (Howie laughed at me and said that I look like a Chinese breakfast food.) By this time I was pretty much out of it because of lack of sleep due to my snoring roommates. I was brought down to the surgery floor along with the three boys. I was wheeled through the family waiting room, which was filled with men chain smoking and women jabbering at one another. This is where I left the guys. I walked to the surgery bed by crossing blue sticky flooring. It was as if they lay down huge sheets of tape so any dust on shoes won't go into the surgery ward. I climbed into the surgery bed and was immediately covered up by a large green comforter. The nurse started rolling me down the hallway towards the surgery room. This was it! Or so I thought. I stopped moving when I got to the operating room door. Then the nurse just left me in the hallway. I lay there for a while and dozed until the anesthesiologist came by and told me who he was and asked if I had any questions. Even if I had any questions I’m not sure he would have been able to answer me in English. I told him no and he walked off. I fell asleep again and woke up in the operating room with doctors and nurses pulling my clothes off of me and telling me how to position myself on the bed. The anesthesiologist then put a mask on my face and simply said, “Sleep”. All of a sudden I was terrified that they would start cutting me open while I was still awake so I fought the sleeping gas as hard as I could. At some point they had put all the heart monitoring things on me and I could hear those beeping. As I was fighting to keep my eyes open I noticed that they were pumping something into my IV. I’m assuming it was the anesthesia stuff because all of a sudden I couldn’t breath. I’m panicking. I’m trying to stay awake and keep my eyes open and now I’m trying to breath but can’t! I wanted to tell them that I couldn’t breath but wasn’t able to move my mouth. I couldn’t move any part of my body. I could feel my lungs not working. I thought, “Well, I might die,” as I heard the heart monitor start beeping faster and faster. I eventually gave up. The doctor’s tried to wake me up after the surgery and all I remember saying is, “I need to pee. I have to go to the bathroom!” over and over again. I didn’t really wake up for numerous hours but I vaguely remember something that Patrick said while I was being moved from bed to bed. It was something like: “They didn’t tie her pants back on? Pull her pants up!” Apparently, my pants had fallen down while I was being moved and Howie’s poor little brother got an eyeful. The rest of the day and the next day was mostly a blur. I remember waking up at one point because I felt like I had to go to the bathroom. I looked at Howie and asked him to put my pillow under my head. He said that I couldn’t have the pillow yet and had to wait a few more hours. I’m not too sure if I got cranky with him or not but he explained that I couldn’t have my pillow until 6:00 and it was only 4:00. I passed out again while playing with my oxygen nose tube thing for a bit. I woke up with my pillow under my head and told Howie I wanted pain medication. Howie asked me if I wanted some morphine to which I responded that I did. (Before the operation I told Howie to ask me this when I woke up in case I wasn’t able to ask.) The nurses came in and shot something into my IV and I slept a while longer. I woke up a while later crying from pain and yelled at Howie that I needed more morphine. He went to tell the nurses that I wanted morphine. They apparently didn’t believe him and came in to look at me. When they saw me lying there crying they ran out then ran back and gave me a shot in the butt. I couldn’t believe that it took me crying in order for them to give me something. When I woke up later, Howie told me that they didn’t have morphine or an equivalent at the hospital but that the nurses gave me something that helped a little. After the shot in the butt I felt a bit better and didn’t need any more. I felt slightly confused why I had an overwhelming urge to pee all the time. I then remembered telling the doctors in the O.R. that I needed to go to the bathroom and vaguely remember them inserting a catheter. After telling Howie that I wanted it taken out he explained to me that the nurses said they had to wait until tomorrow morning. I was not happy about that but too tired to care. Thinking about it now, I’m thankful that I had it so that I didn’t have to get up and go to the bathroom. I remember at one point I woke up to Howie emptying the bag into a Coke bottle to empty into the toilet. I am so thankful for him. Not just for that but for just being him. On Tuesday morning, Jasmine (a girl that I work with) came to visit. She brought me some flowers and left after only a little while because I was so tired. I remember asking Howie about the catheter again. He went and found my doctor and the doctor was dumbfounded as to why I had a catheter to begin with. He then remembered that I kept saying “bathroom” so they put it in. He said it was fine to take out. They did this in my hospital bed with no curtains or anything. There I was for the whole world to see. Later in the day Patrick showed up for a while but I was so out of it still that I don't remember much of what went on. Howie’s friend Wesley and his wife also came by with two huge bags of instant porridge mixes. They don’t speak English so I was in and out while they talked to Howie. Howie’s friend Peggy also came by with two-dozen white roses and a huge fruit basket. I don’t remember who came in what order since I was still quite out of it.

That day we hired a patient care worker. The nurses here don't take care of patients. Their job seems to be doing IVs, taking temperatures, and changing sheets while the patient is being cut open. The patient care worker's name is Yao Jie (her sirname followed by "older sister"). She was very diligent with her job. If I needed anything she tried to do it for me. She probably would have had the surgery for me if she could have. She helped me go to the bathroom (which was really embarrassing), helped me in and out of bed, and did anything else that Howie and I asked her to do. If I woke up in the middle of the night to use the restroom, she got up. She would always put newspaper with a hole tore in the middle of the page on the toilet seat for me. One time, after being in the bathroom, she came out just laughing and hollering about something. Howie told me that I ended up with black Chinese writing all over my butt. I didn't find it that humorous but Howie helped me get it all off while I stood there still slightly delirious holding myself up by the bathroom counter. On Wednesday I was doing much better. I was able to lay on my left side without pain in my right shoulder. I only needed 5 or 6 IVs that day. Julie, my friend from work, came to visit and stayed a couple hours. At one point during a walk in the hallway I came across a small box in Howie’s coat pocket (I was forced to wear his coat when I went in the hallway). He told me it was for me and I opened it to find a pair of white gold stud earrings in the shape of stars. It was my Christmas gift from him. My manager, Tommy, and the main receptionist from school, Freda, came to visit later that evening with flowers. During one of my walks around the halls that night I broke down. I was so fed up with dealing with the discomfort, I missed my family, I didn't feel well, and I wanted some cold water. In this culture, cold water is bad for your health. I was just so tired of drinking hot water that didn't quench my thirst. I was also exhausted because my roommates snore. There were also random people who would come into my room just to look at me. I was also tired of the patient care worker that we had hired. She wouldn't let me do anything by myself and her leg massages hurt. After a horrible night’s sleep I had a few IVs and was told that I could go home because it was Christmas but I had to come back the next day. After the IVs and some breakfast Howie and I high tailed it out of there. His brother had come to help us carry all the flowers and fruit and everything else that I had collected during this. When his brother arrived at the hospital he wouldn't even look at me. He finally waved at me when he saw out of the corner of his eye that I was waving at him. I think he was really embarrassed that he saw me partially naked while moving me from the surgical bed. When we got home we had some lunch then spent the afternoon sleeping. Later that night Julie came over and we talked for a while then headed back to bed. Friday morning I just had to wait around for the doctors to officially release me then Howie and I went home again and tried to catch up on sleep. As of today I am feeling a lot better. I can sleep on both of my sides, eat a lot more than I had been able to, and wash my hair by myself.

The lighter side of the experience:
Each morning in the hospital Howie's little sister cooked breakfast for us and brought it in because the hospital food was so bad.
Although my roommates snored they were very kind and quite funny. One lady was about 40 and worked for customs. Her name is Liang Jie. She had been suffering from gallstones for about 10 years. She ended up getting a fever after the operation and had to stay longer than normal. The other lady is Wei (said like way) Aiyi (said like I.E.), her sirname with aunt. She worked for a hospital and ended up having 20 stones in her when the surgery was finally done. She was funny. Some of the things she would say and some of her facial expressions were the best. Patrick came by a few times and Wei Aiyi had a ton of fun listening to him. She named him "Chi Baozi" because he likes to eat baozi so much.
Dr. Gong came through and the bill for the surgery was 5,000 Yuan less than what I was told it would be. The nurses (one of whom is a friend of Howie's) told us that was the cheapest surgery they had ever seen those doctors perform. I'm very thankful to Dr. Gong for helping us out and for Michael (the school's owner) making a phone call. The surgery, in USD, ended up costing about $2,750.

Everyday I'm feeling better and better and it won't be long until I'm back to normal. I start work again on Friday and I'm sure I'll be in good enough shape by then to do well.

Click here for pictures from the hospital and our apartment decorations.

The Day

I have to have my gall bladder taken out. I have been back and forth to numerous doctors about this and have decided on a doctor and a hospital.

I went to speak with Dr. Li, the specialist, this morning and after about an hour of talking (the other patients only took about 15 minutes) we decided that Monday would be the day. The thing is I can't just go to the hospital for the operation then stay there for a few days for recovery. I have to go in a few days before for some tests and stay at the hospital for two nights. But before I do that I have to go to the hospital and register the day before and give them my personal items. So here is my schedule for the next week.

Wednesday: Work then go to the hospital to register
Thursday: Go to the hospital again for tests and stay the night
Friday: Have more tests and stay the night
Saturday: Work
Sunday: Work
Monday: Have surgery
Tuesday: Recover
Wednesday: Recover
Thursday: Hopefully at home for Christmas

This all wouldn't be quite so bad except that the hospital has no showers. They also don't have food. And the toilets are squatters. I would think that they wouldn't want people who just had surgery to squat. Hopefully they won't make me use a bed pan! Yuck!

The school has also lined up Chinese teachers to take care of my while I'm recovering. I told Tommy, my manager, that I didn't want that and it isn't necessary. I would feel so uncomfortable having all these people I work with taking care of me. Howie is taking his yearly vacation time to take care of me so I really don't think it's necessary for the others to come.

I was told that the cost of the operation would be about 10,000 RMB. That was when they thought I was a student. The girl I went with today told them I was a teacher and the price magically went up to 25,000 RMB. I was crushed when I heard that. I don't have 10,000 much less 25,000!!! Grrr... When the school found out how much it was going to cost, Michael, the owner of the school, called his friend who works there. He told his friend to take good care of me and lower the cost! Having "guanxi" (connections) definately helps!

I also have pictures of Howie if anyone wants to see them.

Come to Dalian

In one of my higher level children's classes, I asked them to write an advertisement for Dalian. This is what they produced: (Keep in mind that they are about 11 or 12 years old.)

1. holiday party
2. improve the environment
3. the history is long
4. eat seafood
5. the people are friendly
6. Once upon a time, there was a old man and a old woman. They were poor, a person gave them a piece of corn flour. The corn flour wouldn't be used up. The bag was called da'lian. Many many years later, the people who lives there called it Dalian.
7. history prison, it was old. Russian and Japanese Museum
8. Snake Island
9. Many tall buildings. Wide roads. Chinese goods were sent to the rest of the world. You can buy anything you want.
10. Ships are big, the transport are good.

This is word for word what they wrote, grammar and bulleted points and spelling and all... I'm just glad they speak better than they write.

If that advertisement doesn't make you want to come to Dalian, I don't know what will.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Honestly, it doesn't even feel like Thanksgiving. I am not with family and there isn't the scent of turkey and stuffing in the air and there isn't football on TV.

I got a few "Happy Thanksgiving" texts today from some friends and that is what reminded me.

Tonight there is a buffet dinner at one of the swankier hotels. Patrick and I are going to that and I can't wait to have American food. Hopefully it will be as good as everyone has said it is. It better be for the price. 180 RMB per person. Not horrible but compared to my usual 10 RMB meals it is a bit outrageous.

Last night I signed a new contract with the school I'm at. I only signed a 6 month contract so that puts me here until at least August 31, 2009. I didn't get what I wanted, a weekend day off. But I do get the same classes that I have this semester so I won't have to spend my evenings planning lessons. I also get to stay in the same apartment and keep the dryer that Patrick and I have.

That's mostly what's been going on here. I hope everyone at home has a great Thanksgiving!

Recent Random Events

I ate real pizza last night! A whole pizza for less than $10.

I was riding on the bus last night and there was a little girl (about 3 years old) singing the opening of Beijing Welcomes You (the unofficial song of the 2008 Olympics) over and over. It was cute.

I spoke an entire sentence of Chinese to a taxi driver and he understood me. I meant to say, "My friend wants to talk to you." According to Howie I actually said, "My friend wants to talk about you." But close enough.

I taught some of my really low level adult students the phrase "I'm blowin' up." That was funny.

I ate noodles tonight. I got them to go. So the shop keeper put them in a plastic bag for me. A bit odd but very normal here.

I will be going to bed tonight before midnight for the first time in over a week.

I now have 2 Chinese tutors not including when Howie teaches me random Chinese.

I learned that Chinese are not allowed to have satellite television. Only foreigners are allowed to have it. And no I won't get it trouble for letting my Chinese friends watch my satellite.

I have decided not to apply for the assistant manager position at another school but to continue working where I am.

I crossed the street by school during rush hour and was almost hit by no less than 10 cars/trucks/buses.

During exams today I learned that my students are, for the most part, retarded. How many times do I have to say "a head of lettuce" for them to remember?